EUROVISION: The London Olympics Edition, part 6

This is the final part of my series, "EUROVISION: The London Olympics Edition." This part highlights the final seven of the countries who sent an artist to represent their respective countries at EUROVISION LVII in Baku, Azerbaijan back in May. Only this time, the participants are those who competed at the London Olympics.

DISCLAIMER: This is 100% spoof. Absolutely and positively spoof, and is NOT meant to be taken seriously.

Okay folks, here we go!

SLOVAKIA. Pavol & Peter Hochschorner "Brothers in Arms"
You thought this was a Dire Straits cover? Hell no. This is a brilliant masterpiece of the brothers-former Olympic gold medal canoeists-who didn't fare so well at London. This is a hybrid of Izabo (ESC Israel winners 2012) and Spandau Ballet. Like both? You'll like this!

SLOVENIA. Urska Zolnir "Roundhouse Kick"
"Roundhouse Kick" is about the gold medal judoka's profession of judo and how much she trained to reach the goal of competing in the Olympics. Fans of Nina Zilli, Nina Badric and Rona Nishliu would enjoy this piece, because it's a hybrid of all three!

SPAIN. Pau Gasol "Get My Ass in the Paint!"
This refers to a postgame interview after a Lakers Western Conference quarterfinal match (2012 NBA Playoffs), where he said "I got to get my ass in the paint." Inspirational rap piece, if you're a big fan of Pharcyde, among others.

SWEDEN. Men's handball team "Oh Well!"
Punk-pop piece referring to the Swedish men's handball team's failure to win gold at London, in the final. If you're a fan of Green Day or Dead Kennedys, this is great for you, because it mashes both!

SWITZERLAND. Michel Morganella "Just a Random Comment!"
Yes! This is about the twitter controversy surrounding the Swiss football after a group match earlier in the Olympics against South Korea, where he mentioned about Koreans as "retards" and other such banter, that resulted in his expulsion from London. Just like Voula Papachristou, they're both are victims of PC. Great for fans of 311 and other bands that have reggae roots.

TURKEY. Gamze Bulut & Asli Cakir Alptekin "A Cut Above the Rest!"
This describes their 1-2 finish in the women's 1500m final perfectly. Includes a Morgan Uceny falling and crying reference. Dance pop fans and Eurodance fans would love this. Think Crush "Jellyhead"!

UKRAINE. Women's quadruple sculls rowers "Fab Four"
Another dancy tune, featuring the four quadruple sculls rowers who won gold. Also takes shots at the US 'fierce five' artistic gymnasts who won gold. Believe it or not, Gaitana (ESC 2012 Ukraine with "Be My Guest") wrote the lyrics and her producing team for most of the run on Viva, Europa, is behind this masterpiece! Hilarious!

So that does it for EUROVISION: The London Olympics Edition!